Be ready to be blown away cause this might just be the most brilliant idea you will ever hear from me.
A friend asked me earlier if I have any back up plans if ever I screw up again and fail to finish here at St. Paul. It really made me think. I can't school hop forever cause I don't wanna end up being classmates with my younger sibs, though that would really be interesting. So I came up with the perfect plan.
I'll knock someone up!
I don't know why it hit me just now. It's the perfect excuse for me to still be asking money from my mom for the years to come and take a time out from school. How fucking brilliant am I?
All I need to do now is find a girl to have my baby. It's perfectly simple. I'll just pick some random girl at the mall and tell her this, "Hi, ako si Abad. bubuntisin kita, k?" Come on! Who would turn me down? I'm tall, quite moneyed, I could pass as ok-looking if you're drunk, and if you're totally wasted, I could even pass as good looking (probably not), I shower everyday or at least whenever I have classes and if you have low expectations, I could even be good in bed. If you could picture me in bed doing it and not puke inside your mouth a little, give me a call. If you really are picturing me doing it, good luck trying to get that image out of your head.
I'll probably ask Janina from Bb. Pilipinas. Do you know where I could reach her? Can she even use a phone? Can she spell phone? Imagine, our kid would be a genius and a real looker. We will have the perfectest paking pamily! We wouldn't have to work cause we'll let our kids work for us on TV.
And as I've previously planned, I'll name my first kid Susan. Susan Enriquez. Regardless of the kid's gender. Just thinking of my kid's classmates teasing him/her kay Susan tayo cracks me up. Any idea on what I should call my second kid? I'm thinking of a name that starts with M. I just can't figure it out exactly.